


Perfect Disguise

by TheCreativeCasseroles



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman Beyond, DC Animated Universe (Timmverse)
Genre: Dimension Travel, Fluff and Humor, Terry and Jason are such little shits, Time Travel, Universe Travel, but they love their families so, long suffering Bruce Wayne, strong sibling energy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:55:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23791954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCreativeCasseroles/pseuds/TheCreativeCasseroles
Summary: It’s pink! It’s fake! It sticks to your face with tape! It’s… a cardboard mustache! And everyone knows that a cardboard mustache is great for the whole family. No one will ever know who you are!
Comments: 27
Kudos: 248





	Perfect Disguise

Terry didn’t quite know how he got into this mess. But now he, his little brother, and his boss were in another universe.

The new universe was super weird. Technology and history was pretty wonky, but thankfully the universe had a Justice League. If push comes to shove, Bruce would contact them for help. Or this universe’s Batman. It was a toss of what Bruce actually thought was best. But until Bruce was one hundred percent certain that they would need help, they were going to try to find a way back by themselves… and that had meant they had to wait until they were able to have a home base so to say.

So. They’ve managed to snag a house, some furniture, and all that good stuff.

Except now they needed to go grocery shopping. Once that was done Mr. Wayne would tell him and Matt what they were going to do.

But that would happen later. At that point in time, Terry was looking at the different types of milk. He was trying to find the one that was both something that Mr. Wayne could handle and Matt would actually drink. Matt was a picky kid and Bruce was limited to what he could eat. He was an old man after all. (Something plant based might be good, Terry thought.) And if Terry couldn’t buy two types of everything then Matt would have to tough it.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw his little brother approach. And he saw something pink?

“Hey Matt, what are you wear-you’re not Matt.” Terry fully turned his head to see a child who looked eerily similar to Matt… but had darker skin, green eyes, a scowl, and glare that could kill… and a cardboard pink mustache taped to his upper lip.

The child tutted. “Of course I am not this ‘Matt’. And I am wearing my favorite hoodie.”

Oh this kid definitely deflected the fact that he was wearing a pink mustache. He could see that the kid did _not_ want to be wearing it.

“… K.” Was all Terry said.

Then, what Terry argued to be the best thing to happen, happened.

A man older than Terry, probably somewhere in his early twenties, practically slid in. A very tall man indeed. Possibly taller than Big Time before he got mutated. Terry couldn’t quite put a number on it, but the man was definitely over six feet tall. The man didn’t really look like the kid at all. His hair was black like the kid’s, but it was curlier, and his eyes were kind of a greenish blue. Yet the thing that connected them was that the man was wearing a fake, cardboard pink mustache as well.

“Oh hello, young sir,” the man said with a posh accent, a grin on his face, “may I interest you in the greatest product in the world?”

Quickly Terry looked between the two. The matching pink mustaches. The age gap. The grin that spelled trouble and the scowl that screamed that he didn’t want to be there. Terry knew siblings when he saw them. He was so going to join in.

“Oh good sir, please do tell.” He said, mimicking the same tone of voice as the man.

A glance at the kid showed that Terry made the right decision. They had that same look Matt gets whenever Terry was being ‘an annoying big brother.’

The man was clearly pleased at Terry joining in. He had that twinkle in his eye. “Why, it is this fabulous mustache perched upon my face and the young one here.” He even strokes it for good measure. “It protects your identity from all sorts of fowl hooligans.”

Terry, having a good time himself, continued with the act. “‘Fowl hooligans,’ you say? I might partake in the wonders of this mustache of yours. What is your price, good sir?”

“Oh nothing at all! It is purely free! I give this to you out of the kindness of my heart.” He even put a hand to his chest.

“Why sir! What a generous sir you are!”

Another small glance was very much worth the act. The kid looked so much like he wanted to destroy everything, but couldn’t. It was the grocery store, you don’t destroy everything at a grocery store.

“I hate you so much, Todd.” The child growled.

Huh. Todd. Must be mystery man’s name.

A shit eating grin appeared on Todd’s face. They both had heard the child. In fact, the child didn’t really do anything to make it so he wasn’t heard. “Don’t mind the scamp. Here, your mustache with the sticking appliance.”

Out from Todd’s pocket was an extra fake pink mustache with a roll of tape.

Terry matched the shit eating grin with his own. “Thank you kindly, sir!” He then took it to put it on.

Not even a moment later his actual little brother came over.

“Terry I fou-What are you wearing.” Matt had that dumbfounded look on his face.

Now, Terry knew that this could go in two ways. Matt would want one and join in the fun, or hate how much his older brother was being weird. Terry hoped it would be the second option.

So, he turned around to fully look at his little brother. And when he spoke, he did so with the fakest French accent ever.

“Ohooo who is this Terry you speak of? Surely I am not this handsome man you are looking for.”

Matt’s face quickly transformed into a look of disgust. “I hate you so much, Terry”

“Ohooo?” Todd slid closer, matching Terry’s terrible accent. “Young lad, I see you are without a mustache.”

“I don’t want one.”

Both Todd and Terry gasped dramatically at the same time.

“You don’t _want_ one! But young lad! This is a great mustache!” Todd pointed to his.

“It makes you look very distinguished!” Terry continued.

“Why, all sorts of hooligans would turn away the moment they see such a glorious mustache.”

“Yeah!” Matt snarked. “Because of how awful it is!”

Terry and Todd looked at one another, then to Matt, and back at each other.

They knew what they had to do.

Later, when Todd and his younger brother had left, and had given Terry an extra mustache for just in case, Terry finally found the perfect milk. Or something close to perfect. If Matt didn’t like it then tough.

“What. Are you wearing.” Bruce stared at the two boy’s faces when they managed to get back to him.

Matt, angry that he somehow was made to wear a fake pink mustache, “The loss of my dignity.”

In fact, Matt would never tell of how it happened. ‘Too humiliating’ he said years later.

Terry, on the other hand, fiddled with the fake mustache. If it were a real mustache, or at least made with any sort of fibers made to look like hair, he would twirl it. “I don’t know what you mean. I’m wearing what I always wear.” He said.

Old man Bruce stared at the two before fully putting his deadpan stare on Terry and Terry alone. “… if you don’t take that off right now I’ll cut your allowance”

The teen gasped dramatically “You _wouldn’t._ ”

Bruce, smirked “I would.”

Slowly the two’s staring contest evolved into a glaring contest.

Later, in the grocery line, Terry, Matt, and Mr. Wayne were standing in front of a family. Everyone was wearing fake ass cardboard pink mustaches taped on.

Including Mr. Wayne. Later, when asked about it, he would grunt and grumble, never giving a proper answer as to how he had the fake mustache on his face.

Idly Terry recognized Todd and the child from earlier. Clearly Todd had roped the whole family into wearing the mustaches one way or another.

The father certainly had that dead eye stare that Mr. Wayne was sporting.

The cashier was obviously underpaid. Their face was impassive. Clearly, they didn’t care about the many people sporting fake pink mustaches made out of cardboard. That was, until they stole a glance at the other family.

“Oh my god you’re Jason Todd aren’t you?” They asked, eyes wide. They didn’t look at anyone else, but Todd, who was more so Jason now, and seemed to have stuck on only him.

Jason got that look in his eye- no- his whole face that said he was going to be a little shit. “No I’m Tason Jodd.” Jason said.

Terry looked at the family. The youngest kid looked ready to murder and the teen around Terry’s age looked ready for death. The older brother and older sister looked amused while the father looked exactly how Bruce did when he found out Terry was taking him to the Batman musical on his birthday.

Terry knew he just _had_ to join in. “Yes, how could you possibly mistaken him? Tason Jodd is a name known throughout the family.”

The cashier was clearly confused by this. “The… family?”

Jason, immediately going with it, “of course! Why, Tason Jodd here knows what’s best.” He gestured to Terry.

Terry nodded. “Of course Tason Jodd.”

Out of the corner of the teen’s eye, he saw his little brother look up to his boss. “Is it possible for me to disown him.”

“Oh shush now TJ.” Terry said, not looking away from the cashier.

“TJ?” Matt asked.

“Of course! For Tason Jodd!” Jason exclaimed. “We’re all named Tason Jodd of course.”

Then, with a grin, the eldest spoke up. “It’s the family name!”

The sister pointed to herself. “Tason Jodd.” She said, ‘confirming’ her name.

The teen around Terry’s age nodded.

And of course, the littlest one scowled something fierce while the father sighed heavily.

Gesturing to Mr. Wayne, Terry spoke, “and here is our wonderful patriarch. Tason Jodd Senior.”

Old man Bruce Wayne, turned to look at Terry, spoke with a deadpan tone of voice. “You’re out of my will.”

.

.

.

Terry, did a double take. “ _I was in your will???????_ ”

He was _in Bruce’s will??????_

Jason bursted out laughing at that. The cashier was very much startled at Terry’s declaration. Matt was just as surprised as Terry.

And the father turned to Mr. Wayne, with a _very similar_ voice to Mr. Wayne’s, spoke.

“I’m so sorry.” Was all he said.

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly don’t remember how I got this idea, but I had this galaxy brain moment of “BB meets comic in a grocery store… and Jason made everyone wear pink mustaches.” And I just HAD to write it! Sure it’s not a lot but sometimes you just gotta write. Anyway, Terry and Jason would have peak sibling energy if they managed to meet thank you for coming to my TedTalk.


End file.
